Monday, October 14, 2013

Goodbye Mom

I don't really know what to say except that I am sad. So sad. Tomorrow would have been my Mom's 80th birthday but she passed away last Sunday just 9 days short of reaching it. She was a kind person. She didn't judge others. She tried always to see the good in other people even when they weren't being nice to her. My Mom was a big kid at heart. Even as an adult she had trouble falling asleep Christmas eve night because she was excited about the coming day. She loved to collect Royal Doulton figurines, and porcelain dolls and she had a real soft spot for teddy bears, especially if they were dressed in little outfits. She knew how to choose the perfect gift for a grandchild - not the ordinary, run-of-the-mill toys that every kid was getting - but always something unique and different. She knit hats and mittens for charity and enjoyed buying toys to donate to Secret Santa at Christmas. She was a good person.

After her stroke she graciously accepted her new situation in life and was well-loved at the Long Term Care center where she lived. She always made a point of telling us not to worry about her living there and that she was happy. She didn't complain, wasn't demanding, and enjoyed her days the best she could. One of the condolence messages left for us on the funeral chapel's website says it all:

"My name is Twyla and I work security at the Wetaskiwin hospital.
I have known Pat for only 6 months, but in that short amount of time,I grew very fond of her. I will miss our morning talks and her shining smile that was always present, even when she wasn't feeling well."

That was how my Mom was. Always friendly and ready to have a little chat with whoever went by. Always happy to introduce her family to the staff and other residents of the home.

We knew she was starting to decline over the past couple of months. She wasn't able to speak as easily or find the words she wanted to say but she had a good sense of humour about it and would laugh at some of the things that came out of her mouth. On one of our last visits to see her she wanted to know how Richard was doing with his new CPAP machine and referred to it as his "bubble machine". She rolled her eyes a bit because she knew she hadn't used the right name and then we all had a good laugh. It was sad to see her slowly lose the ability to knit over the past few months. Week after week she would ask Jen and I to teach her how to knit the dishcloths she loved to make and give away to staff at the home, but by the next week she would have forgotten again.

It was very difficult watching my mother slowly slip away over two days but we are thankful that when these final days arrived she didn't appear to be suffering or in pain. She left the world peacefully and Jen and I will always be grateful that we were together and with her when she passed. I'll miss her. 


Mom with Chris and Matt - Christmas Day 2012
Pat White
October 15, 1933 - October 6, 2013

Until next time...
Susan

4 comments:

  1. I am so so very sorry, Susan. Your Mom from your stories and Jen's, sounds like an amazing lady. I have been thinking of you all since I heard from Jen she wasn't doing well. Sending lots of cyber hugs your way.

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  2. A great loving post Susan. Kind loving thoughts and words. You and Jen have a precious memory of being with Mom in her final moments. Your mom felt the love from her two daughters which made her passing easier. DBnL

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  3. Oh dear my sincere condolences to you Susan at this very sad time.. I do pray you will find strength in the wonderful memories of your dear Mum and your family will gather around to celebrate the beautiful person she was..hugs to you.. lizzy

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  4. A wonderfully loving post Susan. I'm so sad for you and Jen and continuing to think about you this week and beyond

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Thanks! I appreciate your comments.